Priyanka Gulati
Knowing how to lose is the art of winning, knowing how to deal with negativity is the art of positivity.
I have always argued with my mother (who is a great believer of happiness and positivity) that per me not hearing negative news or thoughts is not positivity. Rather, knowing how to deal with negativity is the art of positivity. Clearly you don’t want to run after either. It is not just about pursuit of happiness and surrounding ourselves with smiling faces but about learning how to navigate through vagaries of everyday life, and a large part of it is to face it.
Erik Seidel, one of the best poker players in the world, attributes his sucess to losing. It was only when he lost his job in Wall Street after the crash that he pivoted to learning poker. Before long, he became World Champion, a title he was to win several times over and has been admitted to the Hall of Fame.
Michael Jordan, one of the best basketball players in history, embraced this idea in his “failure” commercial for Nike. “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career,” he said, “...lost almost 300 games. I’ve failed over and over again in my life. That’s why I succeeded.”
And who can forget Lance Kluesner who, after that staggering failure to run an extra run and get South Africa into the World Cup semi finals, said "Nobody died. It was just a game". Not many thought of it that way, but it needs to be kept in perspective.
Our own bridge players have different ways of coping. Here are a few thoughts from some of them.
Jaggy Shivdasani
When I lose I try and shut out whatever has happened and focus on the next hand and if the event is over then the next tourney .. and in life one has lost and won a lot .. so just move on and accept and be strong
Maneesh Bahuguna
Every time you think you have understood the game of bridge, it humbles you immediately. It's failure which is the only recipe for success.
Sunil Varghese
Failure/Loss motivates me to do better. In bridge, when I have a bad deal, it brings out my survival techniques and I end up doing better. The only time it has not worked is against Sunit Chokshi. I genuinely believe that people don’t fail, but the deal didn't work well, or you lose a game.
Manjit Oberai
Losing hurts. It’s a bitter taste that lasts way longer than the sweet taste of victory. And when one is an intermediate player one tends to lose more often than win.
All you can tell yourself is that each failure is a lesson. And just remember the lesson so that the next time around you’re one step closer to victory.
To sum up, success in anything is best achieved through analyzing failure, absorbing learnings from them and developing a rigorous improvement program.
Sadhana Gupta
The last tournament I played was challenging and thought provoking. Sadly, we did not do as well as we would have liked. But, for me, that is not very important.
Winning at bridge is of course wonderful, but failures are equally important. They make you aware of the lacunae in your systems and techniques. I always go over the hands I have played and try and analyze why I bid incorrectly or defended/ declared badly.
I remember the ones where I could have made a contract but did not and that stays with me for a long while. I spend sleepless nights regretting those.
For me, the major learning from the last tournament was that I need to beef up my technique for countering the Multi 2-D. Something which I intend to study with my mentor.
The above players are just a few examples of various categories of players, both male and female. I am sure others have their own techniques too. Don't forget to append them as comments to this post.
So the next time you don’t do well in a tournament or a deal don’t let that affect you, it just means there is more to be done. For example, I eat dark chocolate! 😜
Disclaimer : All opinions are entirely those of the author and are no reflection of the views of the BridgeFromHome Team.
I never get disheartened by failure or losing. I rationalise and say to myself, what’s the lesson it’s teaching me. At the end of the day, if you’ve learnt something, it’s not losing. Both bridge and poker (I’ve won the western caribbean cruise in a poker tournament) are great games and can teach you a lot of things in life.